tree planting part 2

it was sunny in the morning, just about. but as we were making our way (laura, pat and i with kids and others of her community) there was hail, then snow, sleet and it continued on and on. but i was determined to plant the trees, i got more muddy than last time but me and pat worked as a team (she made laura do one tree, meaning just stand there whilst we did it) and got 12 done (or thereabouts, half before lunch and half after). it was a place near marple/stockport called mellor, on their recreation grounds. i was full of snot and kept wiping my nose on my sleeve and gloves, everyone was a lil like that though. and this time we covered the mulch mat with mulch and tied a protective cover around the tree this time too. it was cold af, but apart from mostly continuous rain, sleet, hail and snow, the sun came out after lunch. i was blessed to get dirt stuck under my nails, be in my body once more completely and do some hard graft. i loved giving back to the earth. we planted different native trees like oak and hawthorn. everything will be amazing when it is flourishing.

22/02/2022

i let go of all that no longer serves me, i embody with intention and connect back somatically with who i am. i am building and becoming, i am accepting and allowing. i will receive openly what is being given. i am hopeful and ownershipful. this week is tree planting again, and i'm so excited to get back into hard graft for a few hours. i just hope the weather is alright.

idk to take the risk or to rest.

ash keeps messaging, and it's nice that i've inspired him but do i let him meet me again to tell me his ideas? do i think he'll ground them in reality? is he just off in the clouds? the community greenhouse thing seems to be awaiting council approval so that's not a thing just yet. idk what's next, but all i want to do is rest. when i know i should probably take some more actions. 

i love myself, and for that i trust.

i believe in myself,
it's a must!

i grow and become,
i learn, unlearn,
am whole.

i love myself because i am alive.

happiness belonged to the far off future.

actually, in the acceptance workshop with Jova, i got back to holding my feels and am going to attempt full and deep rest. my body is already giving me signs i need it, i think i've got a head cold and it's very annoying. i want to then get back into writing short stories and maybe poetry. life waits for no one, dad's talking about taking a holiday somewhere (i'm guessing in spring or summer???) so hinted to me. somewhere nearer, like Spain to get some sunshine. choices, things to think about. will has also asked to meet up again, he caught the c around christmas. i just want to pauseeee.

peace be with you, peace within you.

i am looking to slow down, to listen to my inner guidance again. i am in the midst of changing my routine, alongside trusting my new community as a safe space. my nervous system needs extra care rn. i am trying for better sleep, even if it means letting go of midnight wordle. life is changing and i'm all for it.

i'm doin' it all for love, i'm doin' it all for us.

so, a similar pattern dude is in my midst and i'mma get on with my own life and forget about him until he replies to our longggg ass messages. i'm getting more energy, there's more light later now, i'm looking forward to all of the challenges that i've asked for to overcome and move forwards with. i can build the things i truly want, it ain't gonna be easy but it'll be worth it.