whatever you do, i know i'm through.

 whatever the outcome, whoever you are - whether nasty and withdrawing or helpful and kind, i am grounded enough in my own sense of self and my own power. the rest doesn't hold anything over me.

you are the best one, of the best ones.

never before seen temperatures to hit the UK tomorrow, what even is life. i thrive in the warmth, but idk what it's like without a smidgen of a/c at these temps. so far, so okay. body regulating quite well. i'm nervous about the upcoming week but idk, it'll be fine. it's got to be.

i finally get it now.

i need to be at peace with myself and love myself again, try and find lil me pics and connect back in with her. and take it real slowww. if i can't be there for myself, and fall in love with myself, then i won't be able to feel that other people do. i have to feel it first!

i deserve to thrive, and in that re-realisation i know that i have to take risks, but also to let go of whatever i'm still holding on to. it gave me the courage to finally get on with deleting more pics from my phone. if i let go of the old, i can make space to take more pics of NEW and beloved memories. of hopefully beautiful places.

and maybe take a chance on ash.

i love that the brightest full moon of the year is tonight. loadsss to tap into with that.

enjoyin' the summer sun.

it's been blazing hot, there's another heatwave on the way. yesterday, they thanked me for taking writer's group. i am trying to be so soft and tender with lil me, trying to figure out what next. i have limited time alone now, and i want to make the most of it. being me.

let's keep with our responsibilities as well as rest.

i still haven't finished my homework for friday, plus i still need to figure out what i'm doing when chairing on friday. i've got to go see r tomorrow afternoon, and also by saturday need to download/watch as much of hart of dixie s2 on itv player. i am glad for meeting ash at the weekend, he sees something in me (even more so now) and i'mma have to see where this goes. live life a little with him?

nourish yrself and rise above.

take time to give to yourself, nurture yourself and yr needs. then you can give to others in the same ways. rise above your bad habits and take the reins again, you are in control over yourself. you are a sovereign being with bodily autonomy. make space for yourself, allow yourself to have that voice that is yours for the taking. rise above colonialism and the paths that others have made before you. yes, they got you here, but now you get to choose what to make of it! do this for yourself. you are living for you, not for anyone else. go, enjoy life!