remember all you've learned, but know you can unlearn.

i wish i had more time, i woke up earlier today so i could fit more in and yet i still haven't managed to. i go at my own pace but it's all a process. i love talking to opal and others, i love knowing how i feel deeply about life and all the shadow stuff. tomorrow i start a new course and i am nervous. i hope no one i already know will be there :/

i'm never gonna not dance again.

dreaming big about living in warmer climes that have fresh and organic produce in abundance, being able to get lost in nature and the peace and quiet and being able to lean on another as well as community, making and doing and just being. anything is possible, i open my mind, eyes, and my heart.

challenge yr thinking.

the time is to let go, to make space, to rest and renew and re-charge. for the busy month is coming, and i will enjoy it by staying present. she moved my glass of water again today, will she ever learn?! ofc not. yesterday was nice, spending time playing bananagrams with dad and watching this weird movie called Brightburn whilst having Chinese takeout and Jamaican Rum then coffee and walnut cake. today i started a collage and gave one of my macrame leaves to the centre for them to sell on sunday's stall. period incoming. i trust the right things in life are coming. i keep my eyes peeled and make moves.

i have no idea, but i take what i have and do what i can with the present moment.

immersing myself in daily creativity. i went and did zentangle (not many people showed up this morning) and a collage type thing in the middle. then i went off to show sue my next macrame leaf and she was impressed; we started a diamond art kit this afternoon and i barely saw mark and lucky as it was nearly time for the end by the time i got out. there's a service thing for simon at the centre on friday, but spaces are limited to 9 people so idk if i'm gonna go. will ring and find out the deets tomorrow. was thinking of giving in the macrame leaves to the christmas fair craft stall for the 27th. also thinking about helping w the batik stuff again this thursday maybe. i stupidly signed up for tuesday afternoons for a couple of weeks end of nov/early december to do a community project glass painting for the college ugh. but she swung tuesday afternoons instead of monday for me, so i'm gonna have to go. oh yeah, this guy at the centre rubbed his fingers all over the mouth of my bottle when he didn't comprehend filling it up with water after i'd asked him nicely - like wtf. i was super thirsty (hadn't had much water for 4 hrs) so i dared a couple of sips. now i'm sneezing. i hope i don't get anything. esp not the c after never having had it so far. ugh.

but yeah, i continue to love the life i'm living. lil me used to wanna be in a foreign and warmer climate and do all the things, and travel. but i am content with right here, rn. for now.

also, it rang through when i tried rich the other day. whaaaaat even. but not now, i guess if ever, it'll be years down the line.

i'm honoured, i am seen, i deserve all the beauty and goodness in my life rn.

it's a strange 180 from how life looked last week. i have let go of the past, i've viewed some uncomfortable truths (none that i didn't already know, just pulling them into view again), i felt the feels, i moved through exhaustion, i showed up each and every time and i gained something good from it all. life is working for me, and things seem to be charging full steam ahead. i made traditional lanterns for the lights parade at the weekend, i rested, i sat with my feels and stayed with my body, i went and learned more arts and pastels and had fun, tried macramé for the first time with success. then came across lucky and people i haven't seen in a while, and apparently i made mark's day! i love that he loves my smile and my presence uplifted him. i made soup again! i volunteered to do batik painting - and omg they loved my words and my mermaid idea and unbeknownst to me ran with them! my idea and words and lantern will be featured! i am excited and full of hope, and thinking arts and crafts is my next thing.

allow and let go, move on to better.

ahh, made a lantern today using traditional methods. chatted with r. did zombies with chris. ash keeps wanting to give and i shall but receive. i forgot that the stop, breathe, think app is no more and i tried to update it and it won't open. sought out two other meditation apps to replace. but meh. none as good.