Chocolate and Raspberry Scones.

Kindness touches me deeply. Unexpected kindness is even more of a magically lit firework. I feel appreciated, seen, loved. I feel understood in some sense; and it feels like it has crept up on me although it was always slowly building up and now flowering into bloom.

At first I felt conflicted, but now I feel relieved that I don't have to explain myself (I never had to, but I would have felt like I'd had to) and how I got here through all of that mess. I felt confused and into non-trusting patterns of feeling/thought when he said he already knew my address. However, I allowed myself to feel the feeling, and understood my past stumbles and mistrust of others isn't my narrative with him, and that it is all the things of my past. And soon after, I was able to relax into trust and feeling so thankful and in amazed awe.

No one has done such a kind thing for me personally, in such a long time (last Jan, PJ and the Cat book). I never expected them to be here in the post (although the mother received them from the postman) the next morning. I actually thought because of the lack of follow-through from not meeting up this year, that this wouldn't be a thing either.

Then, as I tried to free the container from the tightly wrapped packaging - the anticipation, the excitement. A layer within a layer, then attached to the box itself. Very efficiently and neatly packed. I opened the tightly sealed lid, and inside was like grease proof baking paper sheets and a wadge of tissue - the blue kind. I peeled them back to reveal not two, but three decent sized scones! The ones I had seen unbaked the previous morning in picture form. They looked very delicious, with chunks of dark chocolate all around and a single raspberry on top. I ate a crumb here and there before digging into a chunk at room temperature for lunch. I ate the rest of that one and it was very moreish. Not sure how much sugar and butter went into it but it was incredibly tasty. It wasn't that dry, but also had the consistency of scones, and it was airy and light. Only a while into chowing down did I feel it like a satisfying weight in my stomach. I love how it landed so beautifully in my tummy. I was worried initially, having had some fruit shortcake biscuits for breakfast that I'd have too much gluten/sugar/carbs. But really, the scones felt so fresh in my mouth, and felt wholesome and good, honest food that they went down well. I honestly felt like they had been made with the hands of love. It tasted like he'd made them with his heart and enjoyed making them. I know originally when making them the previous morning, he wasn't intending to make any specifically for me. He'd said that there were two left at the end of the day, and then I got them and there were three! Which was a nice surprise. I got extra!

Just everything was lovely about him and them.