was it just banter and fun to you, or more?

i ate a huge brunch today, tried hash browns in cheese toasted sandwich thins with ketchup. very nom. 

i shed a tear for that rich never communicated well, and all i wanted to know was how he truly felt and how to define things moving forward; to get to know him. could i possibly have?

i let go all that no longer serves me for my next vision in life.

i cont. learning the socks crochet pattern and figuring that out.

i may take another craft group session over.

i'm aiming to let myself be more open and vulnerable with ppl i want to be friends with, because i deserve to have friends i can feel completely relaxed and safe being me with.

i also shed a tear for the fact that i'm craving and v much need time and space to myself, to sit with myself, to be a human unto the earth and connect in stillness and silence. 

it's good that i got to use my voice and talk to Belle earlier.

i miss talking to ppl as friends.

i miss playful chatting with rich.

i need more grounded, centred, balanced fun in my life.

i wish she didn't take over the garden. blasting her music. trying to steam roll her way back in with flooding me with words and not rly having a conversation. i don't want to speak to her but she keeps on at me. she was even saying to join them still when they go to italy - that she'll look into flights for me. what even?! i don't want to be near her like that, i can be courteous as long as she is. but that's as far as it goes.

and oh yeah, she yet again!!! moved my plant pot without saying, and dropped it, toppled slightly but luckily was alright and yeah, moved it into the shade when the sun had not long ago reached it. ugh.